its really, really hard...to be in a relationship by yourself...
its like trying to run a marathon without anybody cheering you on, and encouraging you to keep going....
hopeless.
it takes two to tango.
compromise.
agreement.
half and half.
fifty fifty.
im so tired of this. having the same conversation
OVER AND OVER ANNNNND OOOOVER AGAIN.
w i t h m y s e l f .
its so hard not to want anything, everything, or anyone else.
to envy everybody else's relationship.
to envy the love.
to wish i had a " b o y
f r i e n d " who actually cares. someone who comes home and cant wait to hug you when he walks through the door.
someone who is excited to kiss you.
to hug you, to sleep with you, to hold you...to be next to you.
this kills me.
to be writting t
hese kind of thin
gs again...
i swear.
i swear.
i swear.
i feel, e x a c t l y...the way i felt a year ago...when i hit rock bottom.
the p i t of that somber hole.
helpless, and lonely.
im sure in the morning, hes gonna act like everythings okay...like nothing was said.
im gonna forget, and give
into your B U L L S H I T.
BUT ITS ALWAYS THE SAME SHIT....just like i always do....
IT ALWAYS COMES DOWN TO THIS.
i dont know what else to do....
who to confide in...
because i dont know if a
nyone will beable to understand this madness...
the way my mind just slips away from sanity...
i cant just keep acting like things will get better...
who is gonna make them better...
i cant do it by myself...
and he just sits there...quite, like always...with nothing to say.
and im left, with this g
utter of a " r e a l a t i o n s h i p "
im falling deeper, and deeper into a somber lonely hole.
i look to my right and someone who has been there from the begining.
the boy who took a chance.
the
boy with the five dimples.
falling alongside me...into deep, dark, lonely madness.
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