Never in my life,
other than my daughter; have i ever met another beautiful human being.
***
***
At this very second, i am upset with him, and i swear i can say i hate him a million times, and love him a infinite amount more. There are no words for this feeling i get when i watch him smile, laugh and talk. I've never met a more obnoxious, stubborn, arrogant, and STUBBORN human. Ivan is thee mere definition of every single one of those words. I actually left out asshole. But what i love more than all those ugly words is when he is this kind and gentle creature. Which is rare, but also enough, for me to notice. I am in absolute,
other than my daughter; have i ever met another beautiful human being.
***
***
***
***
***
At this very second, i am upset with him, and i swear i can say i hate him a million times, and love him a infinite amount more. There are no words for this feeling i get when i watch him smile, laugh and talk. I've never met a more obnoxious, stubborn, arrogant, and STUBBORN human. Ivan is thee mere definition of every single one of those words. I actually left out asshole. But what i love more than all those ugly words is when he is this kind and gentle creature. Which is rare, but also enough, for me to notice. I am in absolute,
L O V E
with this person. The person he was, has been and the person he has become. I cannot put into words what he means to me.
***
***
***
The universe just isn't enough.
He's given and done so much for me. He's also taken so much away from me also...to many things to explain here. My trust being one of them, is probably the hardest to get back. My love, was never gone, from the second he told me he was done, to the very second he told me he wanted u s again.
He is all of the beautiful things in life, the sweet, simple, and gorgeous. The sunrise and sunset. The Laughs and smiles, funny jokes and funny faces. The sun, the moon and the stars. I love him.
***
Where e v e r y t h i n g started.
October 10th, 2010, was by far the best day of my life. The day i met the terrible, left handed lovely.
***
***
"If I could touch you, I'd never let go
He is all of the beautiful things in life, the sweet, simple, and gorgeous. The sunrise and sunset. The Laughs and smiles, funny jokes and funny faces. The sun, the moon and the stars. I love him.
***
***
***
***
Where e v e r y t h i n g started.
October 10th, 2010, was by far the best day of my life. The day i met the terrible, left handed lovely.
***
***
***
***
It was all so beautiful, every second of that day. The second we started texting, which was the beginning of that day. You swore, you knew exactly the person i was, because you used the words "baby and cutie" which was cute and flattering, but also foreign to me. No one had ever given me attention like that in that way, and it was so strange to me. You asked me to a movie, and of course i agreed.
***
***
I curled my hair, and put on whatever i could pull off. Wishing it was something you'd like and think was "cute" enough. I had butterflies all day. I loved it. Feeling pretty, like someone was interested. I remembered the first time i saw your face, r e a l l y, for the first time. When i got in the car, i saw your face but i didn't really s e e it. We got off the car to see a movie, and in between the time we got off the car to the moment we stepped up to buy the tickets, was when i saw your face. Beautiful and full of dimples. That was when i knew...I loved you.
***
***
We watched a movie, i can't even remember what it was called at the moment, and i don't recollect what it was about, exactly.
***
(movie we watched)
***
I was too focused on how gorgeous your face was. But what i do remember is wanting to be in your arms, wanting to touch your face and wanting to be everything you wanted.
"I wanted him like i wanted air to breathe. Not a choice, a necessity."
I was mesmerized.
***
***
We sat in the Indio Del Taco parking lot, in your silver Honda, for probably three hours. Conversating, smiling and laughing. It was absolutely perfect. You drove me home with a content smile on your face. and right before i got out of the car, you asked for a kiss. And again of course i agreed. It wasn't all that great, that first kiss y o u gave m e. But i laughed at it and confidently went in for a stronger and more passionate second kiss. And left your Honda with the biggest smirk on my face. It was perfect. You were perfect.
The second night, we hung out at the La Quinta park and talked for another three hours and kissed more. You played a song for me, and its my most favorite song in the whole entire universe. "Stutter" by Maroon 5. You sang it to me and i loved it.
"If I could touch you, I'd never let go
Now you got me screaming and I cannot shut up, oh, shut up, yeah
Now I am lying on the bedroom floor barely even speaking
And I cannot get up, get up
Oh I really, I really, I really need to know
Or else you gotta let me go, ooh
just a fantasy girl
It's an impossible world
All I want is to be with you always
I give you everything
Pay some attention to me
All I want is just you and me always
Give me affection
I need your perfection
Cause you feel so good
You make me stutter, stutter, stutter"
***
Ever since then, i didn't spend a day apart from you, unless i really had to. I was stuck, hooked.
You were permanent.
We fell in love.
I love you, my Ivan.
Infinitely, irrevocably, unconditionally in love.
***